The Highlights From My Absence: I'll Be Back Soon. - GeekStreetMedia
 
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Marvel's Hawkeye
Dear Anyone Who Noticed That I haven’t Posted Anything New In Like A Week,

Sorry about my absence, guys.  I’ve been a little busy; there’s this college that I’ve been trying to graduate from for a while, so I had to do that really fast.  I just thought I’d touch base before I’m back for good.

So how have things been?  I’ve heard some things have happened while I’ve been away. Like, did you hear that Megan Fox got booted off Transformers 3? After she got the axe, she didn’t have anything to say about the whole thing, but her publicist released a statement saying that she quit. I’m pretty sure she didn’t quit, seeing as that would be tantamount to career suicide; it's not like Jennifer's Body had filmmakers beating down her door.I think Michael Bay probably waited until the last possible second to fire her as revenge for her loudmouth criticisms of his on-set directing style.  So, how, you ask, is the Transformers franchise going to meet its soft-core quota now that she’s gone?  Well don't you worry your horny little heads.  Not shockingly, Bay has replaced her with a Victoria Secret model named Rosie Huntington-Whiteley.  So, which aspect of the movie is more unbelievable: giant robots from space who transform into different expensive automobiles, or that Shia Labeouf’s love interest is a lingerie model?

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The Fox Replacement: Rosie Huntington-Whiteley
And how about Jean Claude Van Damme signing on to the cast of Kung Fu Panda 2? I can’t remember the last movie he did that didn’t go straight to DVD.  In fact, the last thing I remember seeing him in was that episode of Friends.  It’ll be funny, though.  Those animated movies use those little gimmicks pretty well.  He’ll probably play some ironic character like a baby chick or a French sloth.

I also heard the Marvel film universe added some big names to its upcoming slate of projects.  Tommy Lee Jones (Men in Black, No Country for Old Men) is rumored to have a part in The First Avenger: Captain America, and Jeremy Renner (S.W.A.T., The Hurt Locker) is rumored to have signed on as the purple, bow and arrow toting Hawkeye.  While the former seems to be closer to a sure thing, the latter seems to still be making its way through the rumor mill.  These Marvel movies seem to have the right idea in terms of casting; signing two actors from films that won Oscars for Best Picture can’t hurt the quality of the Marvel films (but writing can…).

Well that’s all for now. I’m going to go put the finishing touches on this education I’ve been working on. Talk to you soon.

Yours always and forever,

Andrew

Source: Screenrant



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